帮我修改修改这篇作文把要求是：Directions:HereYouarerequiredtowriteanargumentativeessayofatleast120wordsonthetopic“DeceptionsoverthephoneandCell-phone”,accordingtotheoutlinebelow:–1.Descriptionofthe

Question

帮我修改修改这篇作文把
要求是：
Directions: Here You are required to write an argumentative essay of at least 120 words on the topic “Deceptions over the phone and Cell-phone”, according to the outline below:
–1. Description of the phenomenon
–2. Analysis of the reasons
–3. Suggested solutions
With the continuous high speed of advance of high-tech and science, all kinds of deceptions and swindles have been springing up like mushrooms. Like online scam, Fishing, spam and any other different forms, and the deception over phone is the most annoying among them. You may get a message bearing a congratulation saying that you have been chosen from one million audiences and will be awarded a large sum of money but you have to remit some money to them up front. Apparently, it’s a primary deception which is easier to figure out.
Many people want to make a lot of money via this way regardless of the victims’ sacrifice. And on the other hand, it’s the lack of safety consciousness that reveal the feasibility and availability to implement deceptions. Frankly, the service provider, to some extent, also need to take some responsibility.
As far as I can see, there exists three solutions to prohibit the deception. First, a law must take effect promptly to block those actions. Second, government responsible to awake the safety consciousness must popularize the severity of swindles and the method to sense the deception. Third, the ASP must launch the real-name registration system to punish those who are denounced to have done deceptions.

Answer 1

第一段：Take online scam.Fishing,spam and any other different forms are popular.And deception over phone is the most annoying among them.
第二段 on the other hand 前面不要and
第三段 government is responsible to awake the safety consciousness and popularize the severity of swindles.What's more,methods of perceiving the deception should be provided.
have committed deceptions.
我的想法仅供参考,其实你写的很好了.