改正英文作文!英文作文高手进!希望能帮我找出作文中的错误!Writeanoccasionwhenanattempttohelpledtounexpectedconsequencesforthehelper.IwasonmywayhomeafteratediousschooldaywhenIsawanoldmanlyingonth

Question

改正英文作文!英文作文高手进!
希望能帮我找出作文中的错误!
Write an occasion when an attempt to help led to unexpected consequences for the helper.
I was on my way home after a tedious school day when I saw an old man lying on the floor.Without much consideration,I ran to the old man and reached down to check him.
“Hey,are you okay?” I asked in a small voice.
The old man did not reply me.He was unconscious.I did not know what to do.Should I call the police?I asked myself.After a while,I decided to check him first.The old man was wearing a tottered coat.His face was covered with mud.He seemed not like a good person.I concluded after five minutes.I wanted to go home but I knew that I should do something.I could not just leave the man there,while he was unconscious and alone.I knelt beside the old man and started to shake him.He opened his eyes seconds later.He was surprised to see me there.
“Who are you?What do you want!” the old man hollered at me and started back away.
“Calm down.I just want to help you.” I assured him.I did not even know I did that.I could just go home because the old man had already waked up.
Seconds later,the old man seemed regain his calmness as he started to walk closer to me.He knew that I was just trying to help.
We sat together and started to chat.The old man explained that he did not have children and he had been living on himself for many years.I felt sympathetic for him.I also felt fortunate for having my parents who loved me so much.
Suddenly,there was a car moving towards us with great speed,followed by a few cars.I was puzzled at first.The old man suddenly jumped up and grasped me by my throat.I was scared,very scared.I wanted to know what happened.
“What are you doing?” I spoke in a broken and weak voice.
“Sorry,but I have no choice.” The old man whispered.
Seconds later several policemen came to us.The old man threatened them that he will kill me.He had one knife in one hand and pointed it at my stomach.I did not dare to move an inch.I did not dare to cry for help.The only thing I could do was to swallow my tears back.I did not want to provoke him.
There was a loud noise.By the time I realized what happened,the old man had already fallen to the ground.A woman was consoling me and walking me towards a car.I did not know what happened after that.I was too tired and scared that I fell asleep immediately after I got into the car.Darkness engulfed me.
I woke up the next morning in a hospital.My mother was sitting beside me.I explained everything to her.
“Sorry,I should not help him.” I apologized.
“Honey,you have learnt your lesson.” Mother smiled and assured me.
I buried my head in my mother’s hair as tears started to well up in my eyes.I felt regret again for helping the old man.

Answer 1

I was on my way home after a tedious school day when I saw an old man lying on the floor.Without much consideration,I ran to the old man and reached down to check him.
“Hey,are you okay?” I asked “with” a small voice.
The old man did not reply "me删掉".He “had lost his consciousness”.I “have no idea about” what to do.Should I call the police?I asked myself.After a while,I decided to check him first.The old man was wearing a tottered coat.His face was covered with mud.He “didn't seem” like a good person.I concluded after five minutes.I wanted to go home but I knew that I should do something.I could not just leave the man there,while he was unconscious and alone.I knelt beside the old man and started to shake him.He opened his eyes seconds later.He was surprised to see me there.
“Who are you?What do you want!” the old man hollered at me and started “to”back away.
“Calm down.I just want to help you.” I assured him.“I did not even know I did that”好像不太通?.I could just go home because the old man had already waked up.
Seconds later,the old man seemed regain his calmness as he started to walk closer to me.He knew that I was just trying to help.
We sat together and started to chat.The old man explained that he did not have children and he had been living on himself for many years.I felt sympathetic for him.I also felt fortunate for having my parents who loved me so much.
Suddenly,there was a car moving towards us with great speed,followed by a few “other” cars.I was puzzled at first.The old man suddenly jumped up and grasped me by my throat.I was scared,very scared.I wanted to know what happened.
“What are you doing?” I spoke in a broken and weak voice.
“Sorry,but I have no choice.” The old man whispered.
Seconds later several policemen came to us.The old man threatened them that he will kill me.He had one knife in one hand and pointed it at my stomach.I did not dare to move an inch.I did not dare to cry for help.The only thing I could do was to swallow my tears back.I did not want to provoke him.
There was a loud noise.By the time I realized what happened,the old man had already fallen to the ground.A woman was consoling me and walking me towards a car.I did not know what happened after that.I was too tired and scared that I fell asleep immediately after I got into the car.Darkness engulfed me.
I woke up the next morning in a hospital.My mother was sitting beside me.I explained everything to her.
“Sorry,I should not help him.” I apologized.
“Honey,you have learnt your lesson.” Mother smiled and assured me.
I buried my head in my mother’s hair as tears started to “是不是改fulfill比较好?” in my eyes.I felt regret again for helping the old man.
引号的部分是修改的,总体而言很不错的一篇文章