帮忙改个英语句子,主要看前半句,如果错误较大,可重新写一个,改好的可加分请尽快回答Theundergraduatesarejoiningthearmyfrom10%in2004to20%in2011,accordingtoasurveybyprofessorChenHongofTsinghuaunive

Question

帮忙改个英语句子,主要看前半句,如果错误较大,可重新写一个,改好的可加分 请尽快回答
The undergraduates are joining the army from 10% in 2004 to 20% in 2011,according to a survey by professor Chen Hong of Tsinghua university,published from Tsinghua science and technology.
一项出版在清华学报上的由陈宏教授进行的调查显示,在校大学生参加数量由2004年的10%提升到2011年的20%
改好的可加分 请尽快回答
回答就修改前半句 要最准确的 好的还可加分

Answer 1

一楼简直是在胡说八道,二楼翻得还不错,只有小小错误.
According to a survey conducted by Professor Chen Hong that was published in the Journal of Tsinghua University, the number of undergraduates joining the army has risen from 10% in 2004 to 20% in 2011.