写的一篇airpollution的essay,请问,真的很烂么?Thereareseveraleffectsforairpollutionaroundtheworld。Firstly，airpollutionbringsomeseriousdiseases。Forinstance，theamountofoldpeoplewholivesintheurbanareasandget

Question

写的一篇airpollution的essay,请问,真的很烂么?
There are several effects for air pollution around the world。Firstly，air pollution bring some serious diseases。For instance ，the amount of old people who lives in the urban areas and get lung cancer is increasing sharply in the current。Secondly，individuals should have negtive thought for this modern city because of air pollution，as a consequence ，the tourism of this modern city will not develop very advanced。In addition ，the large corporations and the affluent individuals will have bad impression for thie city ，as a result ，they will not invest in this modern city。Finally ，air pollution will bring some environment problems such as global warming and may affect weather patlerns。

Answer 1

文章总体上很好,略有瑕疵,稍加改动,大写标出,仅供参考：
There are several effects for air pollution around the world.Firstly,air pollution BRINGS some serious diseases.For instance ,the amount of old people who lives in the urban areas and get lung cancer is increasing sharply AT PRESENT.Secondly,individuals should have negtive thought for this modern city because of air pollution,as a consequence ,the tourism of this modern city will not develop very RAPIDLY.In addition ,the large corporations and the affluent individuals will have bad impression for THE city ,as a result ,they will not invest in this modern city.Finally ,air pollution will bring some ENVIRONMENTAL problems such as global warming and may affect weather patlerns.