求雅思作文评分somepeoplesaychildrenshouldobeyruleswhileotherssaychildrenwhoarecontrolledtoomuchwillnotbewell-preparedforadultlife.discussbothviewsandgiveyourownopinion.Asforahostofreasons,childrenespeciallywhose

Question

求雅思作文评分
somepeople say children should obey rules while others say children who are controlledtoo much will not be well-prepared for adult life.discuss both views and giveyour own opinion.
Asfor a host of reasons,children especially whose parents are strict are coercedto follow guardians’ orders.However,it has not reached a unanimous consensuson whether the juvenile should totally follow the rules made by supervisors ornot.
Children,without the capacity to distinguishbetween right and wrong,should do as roles demand them to some extent.In thisday and age,with the proliferation of nudity and crime on TV and internet,childrenmay access negative information through doing the things forbidden like going tointernet bars.Moreover,the juvenile,as the vulnerable group in society,ifunruled,are prone to children trafficking.The children confronted withtemptation are easily cheated by would –be criminals if they do not follow theorder which do not allow children to talk with strangers.
However,totally following rules does not comewithout adverse effects.Childhood,as an important period of buildingdisposition,should not fully be designed by others.Without trying somethingnew,children who wholly abide by the orders cannot be well aware of whatthings he or she ultimately is interested in,which,in turn,poses undesirableimpact on career choosing in future.Further,children should learn how to makedecision by themselves instead of absolutely conforming to rules,which havesignificant role to play in adult life.
In conclusion,children,from my perspective,shouldgranted the right to try the things which can really arose their interestingwhile abiding by the rules to some extent.

Answer 1

1.你这篇最多只有5分,原因是字数不够,所有字数不够的文章都是5分起评,超过字数太离谱的也是5分起评,你目前字数229,雅思要求最少250,建议字数控制在250-275以内.
2.假设字数够的话,我感觉这篇作文只能拿5.5分左右,你里面语法问题有点吓人,好多中国式英语,这是雅思作文一个大忌!赶紧回家补习句式……
3.如果不看你语法光看内容的话,也就只能6分.这篇作文虽然结构很好,开头结尾,两个观点都阐述的十分清晰,但是内容比较平淡比较普通,没什么特别的亮点（观点上）所以很难打高分……