帮我修改一篇大学英语作文这篇作文提交到新视野自动批改作文系统的时候只给了2分（最低分）,我不知道为什么,是不是有什么语法错误,请高人帮忙看下It’sourparentswhobringustothebeautiful

Question

帮我修改一篇大学英语作文
这篇作文提交到新视野自动批改作文系统的时候只给了2分（最低分）,我不知道为什么,是不是有什么语法错误,请高人帮忙看下
It’s our parents who bring us to the beautiful world. Our parents, the people who stand behind us and help us bridge over the mountain. When we were a baby learning to walk, our parents always lent us a hand and encouraged us to get up while we fell down.
We are lucky since our parents love us so deeply. If we want to have some things, they always buy them for us. When we are ill, they are always worried about us. They take care of us day by day. We became so accustomed to these that we take these for granted. Sometimes we complain about our parents or even directly contradict with them!
Let’s tell our parents that we love them and thank our parents for what they have done for us: You are with me when I’m happy or sad; you support me in time of good or bad. I will keep that in mind. At last, for all the parents all over the world, may every moment of your life be filled with joy, and best wishes from your children!

Answer 1

It’s our parents who bring us to the beautiful world.Our parents,the people who stand behind us and help us bridge over the mountain.When we were babies learning to walk,our parents always gave us a hand and encouraged us to come to our feet while we fell down.
We are lucky since our parents love us so deeply.If we want to have some things,they always buy them for us.When we are ill,they are always worried about us.They take care of us day after day.We became so accustomed to these that we take these for granted.Sometimes we complain about our parents or even directly contradict with them!
Let’s tell our parents that we love them and thank our parents for what they have done for us:You are with me when I’m happy or sad; you support me in time of good or bad.I will keep that in mind.At last,for all the parents all over the world,may every moment of your life be filled with joy,and best wishes from your children!
我没有发现大的问题,只是非常像中国人写的英语作文.此外bridge over 用climb over 更好些.
望学习更多更地道的英语.